i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
hell yes lets make some ravioli
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
