Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Randomize
