I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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