I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
