I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
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