I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
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