mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
