we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
