Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
