you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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