Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Randomize
