Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Randomize
