I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
