So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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