You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
