is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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