Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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