she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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