dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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