1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize