Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Be still, my beating vagina.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
