This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
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