i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
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