i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
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