yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Someone signed my nipple.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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