Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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