So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Randomize
