I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
