i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
