New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
