I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize