If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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