OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
