I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
