I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
