Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
