Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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