I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
