She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I can feel your judgement through the phone
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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