It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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