i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
i want to swaddle you in tequila
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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