no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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