He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
