This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Randomize
