ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
