I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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