Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
jump out the window naked night went bad
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
