I am puke
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
