I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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