Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
